of refusals and revelations
by hushhushyou
Summary: Where Casey's attempts to get Derek to admit his feelings, is a lot harder than it seems.


This is the first time at writing Dasey. God forbid it be the last time because, somewhere along the lines, this pathetic excuse of a story came up.

**: **Set post-Futuritis and during college at Queens.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

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><p>There's a point where ludicrous meets lunacy, conjoined by the beginning letters and ending with inevitable disaster. Casey stands at this point, deliberating on the fact that she has just had a revelation. One that could pose as a serious threat towards mental instability, and she takes it to herself to do everything she can in her power to adhere to this so-called "revelation" and put forth action.<p>

She is going to set Derek in his place and get him to admit his undying and obstinate love for her.

Or at least finally get him to confess that he, indeed, has the hots for his stepsister and nothing is going to stop her, not even his elementary attempts to swim in De-Nile.

::-::

"Good morning Derek."

"What do you want?"

Casey smiles and ignores his question as she walks past the door of his dorm, pushing him roughly aside, and inadvertently missing the confusion in Derek's eyes as he watches her back hesitantly. She saunters over to the living room couch, and pulls out what seems to be a notebook from her excessively large bag that she carefully slides off her arm and sets on the coffee table. With notebook in hand, she randomly flips to a page and stops before looking up to see Derek staring incredulously at her.

"I'm aware that you have as much etiquette as a dog learning to potty train, but I need you to stop looking at me like that." Casey quips as she sits down on the couch, and Derek knows that she's about ready to give a lecture of the sort, so he quickly readjusts himself before walking towards her and grabbing her notebook.

"Let me repeat myself a little louder this time. _What_ do you **want**?"

Casey huffs and stretches out her hand in an attempt to get her notebook back, but Derek shoos her hand away and hides the notebook behind him. "You walk into my dorm _uninvited_, set your crap on MY coffee table, insult me without reason, and you expect me to stand here and listen to what bull you have to say?"

"Well-"

"No. There will be none of this on my turf!" Derek barks out and Casey, for a moment, is nervous and thinks about backing out of her precious plan, but after realizing that it's morning and Derek's just being cranky, diminishes the thought and stands up to face him.

"I understand, Derek, that you are most likely exhausted from whatever late night.. excursions," Derek makes a point to raise his left eyebrow, "you were busy with previously and you probably don't want to hear whatever it is I have to say-"

"You got that right."

"-but I need you to listen because this is very important." Casey finishes, ignoring Derek's loud guffaw that she knows is just to spite her and her attempt at getting him to actually listen.

"So what you're trying to tell me here is.. that you're pretty much just wasting my time?" He flings the notebook at an unsuspecting Casey and before she can yell out, he cuts back, "Funny, but no thanks. I'll pass." And he pushes her aside, sits down, and turns on the TV.

Casey glares heatedly at Derek's mop of brown hair, wishing to burn holes through his head, but Derek acts oblivious to it and continues to concentrate on the TV. So she takes her notebook, and once again, flips to the page she was at previously before he had stolen it from her, and clears her throat loudly to get Derek's attention.

"Just so you know, I've done painstakingly _thorough_ research relating to the mental, physiological states of mind and read up on perceptual theories on the explanation and behavior of emotions."

Derek doesn't even look up to acknowledge Casey's declaration of her studies, and mindlessly pushes her leg away to get a better look at the hockey game being displayed on the TV. With much more effort, Casey stands in front of the TV and begins again; reading a segment from her notebook and disregarding Derek's obvious displeasure to the fact that she effectively made him miss one of his favorite teams score a goal.

"The James-Lange theory suggests that the bodily changes follow directly the perception of the fact, and that our feeling of the same changes as they occur is the emotion." Casey looks away from her notebook and down to Derek's questioning face before carrying on.

"What that means is that emotions are feelings which come about as a result of physiological changes rather than being their cause." Before she can continue though, Derek pushes her hard enough that she falls onto the couch and drops the notebook. Consequently he picks it up and throws it swiftly across the room whilst Casey looks back in horror.

"Hey! Those notes took me forever to wri-"

"What will it take you to leave? Because I have no idea what in hell you're saying. So either you explain to me the cause of your insane blabber, and in terms that **I**can understand, OR you go away." Derek sputters out angrily.

For a moment Casey doesn't know how to respond. She doesn't know how to approach the subject of Derek's _pining_, as she so calls it, without referring back to her notes. Derek's barbaric behavior is something she forgot to take into consideration when she planned this all out. So she hastily brushes off the invisible dust on her clothes and contemplates on what she should say next. In the silence, Derek waits impatiently for the explanation on Casey's random thesaurus-induced details of the human emotions. Finally, after what seems like eternity, Casey speaks up.

"Derek, I know this is probably a foreign concept to you and you're probably feeling a bit apprehensive because of it, but you should know that I am, without doubt, on to you and your workings."

Derek glances at Casey's hardened blue eyes, ignoring the accusation in them, and counters back with a puzzled, "Huh?"

"Please, Derek, don't act stupid with me. I am aware of your feelings towards me and I just want you to know that-"

"Excuse me, did you just say _feelings_" Derek interrupts with as much repulsion as he can render with the word, "towards you? God, you _are_ going insane." He shakes his head in an attempt to rid the idea of having any thoughts with Casey. He puts two hands on his face and breathes out a long, gratifying sigh before facing her again.

"Okay. I don't know where you got this asinine idea, and please don't look at me like that Casey; you have a tendency to rub off your keener attributes towards me, but I surely and indefinitely have no f-f-" Derek wheezes as if he's about to have a heart attack just saying the word, "_feelings_ towards.. you of all people!"

Casey looks at him unperturbed and puts a comforting hand on Derek's shoulder. "It's alright. I understand you're in denial of this and of course, I expected this. So I've taken liberty, as of right now, to let you know how I feel and how I feel about you, Derek, is mutual." Casey concludes with a charismatic smile that even Derek can't deny is beautiful, but that doesn't change the fact that Casey's pleading insanity, so he takes her hand that's on his shoulder and holds it in both of his.

"Casey, Casey, Casey. I'll admit, I admire your effort to try to crack this out of me, but I don't think this is about me. Is it?" Derek smirks in satisfaction as Casey wears the confused expression he had just moments before. "I think this is about you."

"Me?" Casey points involuntarily to herself.

"Yes, you. I believe it's _you_ who's in denial of your own feelings towards _me_. It's okay, I understand, because no one can resist the Derek Venturi Charm especially since well.. I'm Derek." He sneers and misses the glower Casey gives as he shakes her hand up and down.

"So put your feelings aside and just let it be. There's no way to resist me. That's just how life is with me, Case."

Casey takes this all in stride as she stares obliviously at their conjoined hands. She almost makes a move to take her hand back, but she changes her mind when she notices how warm his hands are on her skin and something stirs in her, and it kind of feels good, she adds as an afterthought. So she keeps staring at their hands and goes over what Derek has just said and, after much deliberation, realizes that Derek is just a load of bull.

"De-rek! You are so full of it that you're trying to push this on me!" Casey shrieks. "I'm pretty sure I was the one who admitted my feelings towards you, so how in the world am _I_ the one in denial?"

Derek makes a show of shrugging his shoulders and letting go of her hand. For a second, Casey misses the warmth that was once escalating on her hand, but pushes that thought away and also pushes Derek back further into the couch, finger pointing accursedly at his chest.

"I'm not playing games with you _D_. If you don't take the chance to tell me now how exactly you feel, then don't expect me to sit around and wait til you're ready, because we're older now and I'm not going to keep playing this game of Cat and Mouse! It's now or never, and I would hope that even you with your stupid wits, wouldn't be stupid enough to-"

Casey is cut abruptly short from her speech because she's hit with such a force, and she realizes too late that Derek is slumped against her as he's hugging her. A thought comes to mind that this is the family moment that she's always been waiting for, but this isn't how she pictured it to happen, and why does it feel so _wrong_. She doesn't return the hug, afraid that this might just be a prank or at least a diversion to a prank that she has unforeseen, but Derek doesn't budge.

She sits still, cautiously waiting for something, but nothing comes. Derek's arms are encircling her waist and she doesn't know what to think of this. She can feel his fingers splayed out on her lower back, unconsciously rubbing the skin that's been exposed due to Derek's arbitrary hug. His face is buried in between her hair and she can feel his hot breath on her neck. A blush creeps up onto Casey's face, and she finds herself pulling away slowly. Derek looks back at her with such unsuspecting brown eyes that look 5 shades darker than they had minutes before.

"Casey. I'm not in denial." Derek states with a tone much too vigor for her taste. Casey stares back skeptically, but Derek ignores this and concedes on.

"You think just because you researched up a bunch of facts on emotions that you can suddenly do a psycho analysis on mine? That's now how this works. _Sis_." He adds the aforementioned noun at the last minute and finds immediately that it was exactly the right blow, because Casey's face contorts into one of trepidation. He sets a hand on her thigh and moves closer so that their legs are much too close, and Casey's head spins, as all she feels is the warm hand that's on her uncovered leg. She thinks how foolish she was to wear a skirt that day; the weather couldn't have been that nice. But now his hand is once again touching her bare skin and there's a sensation at the pit of her stomach that could be mistaken as butterflies, but really, it feels like she's about to throw up.

Derek's eyes look condescendingly into hers and she knows that he's trying to intimidate her, but she seems to be rendered speechless and she finds that his intimidation tactics are effortlessly working. And just when Casey thought this couldn't get any more awkward, Derek moves his hand up closer on her thigh until his fingers are inconspicuously toying with the hem of her skirt. Her face blushes a deep red and she wants to move, wants to swat his hand away and yell at him for acting so.. so stupid, but now it's her body that's going against her wishes staying still, and she's not sure if it's because she's scared, or because he's now sliding his other hand underneath her shirt.

"_Casey_," Derek's voice breaks as her name slips out, but his voice is so considerably low that Casey's not sure that she even hears him. He closes his eyes in frustration and pulls her body closer so that their faces are almost touching. "You're so _annoying_."

"What?" Casey whispers finally, finding the ability to speak. Derek opens his eyes and they look at each other once more with so much concentration that it makes Casey's eyes hurt, but she refuses to blink, afraid that if she does that she might miss something. His hands are searing on her skin and while his left hand is discreetly stroking her hip, his right hand is still fingering the edge of her skirt and it's sending shivers down her spine.

The TV is still on, blaring out cheers and resonance of sticks hitting puck, but the only thing Casey can hear is the sound of her and Derek's breathing, and it sounds so deafening that nobody notices the TV on any way. Derek stops stroking Casey's hip and moves his hand up higher, smoothing a hand over her stomach. Casey involuntarily shudders from the close contact.

"Do you want to know how I **really** feel?" Derek murmurs sickeningly close to her ear. She nods her head and with doing so, causes Derek's mouth to graze over her earlobe and Casey turns away ashamed, because this isn't what she planned, and it was supposed to be just a simple affirmation of how he feels, not how he _feels_. With his hands, and his lips, and his body intruding into her personal space.

Derek pays no heed to the wave of uneasiness that washes over Casey as his mouth moves slowly across her jaw line, placing fervent kisses along the way. His left hand is still underneath her shirt, dangerously close to her breasts, running small circles around her navel. Casey makes an attempt at moving, but Derek advances her too quickly and they're deeper into the couch than Casey thought was even possible.

Derek's lips glide from her jaw to her neck, and an unfamiliar sensation ripples through as he lightly bites the spot above her collarbone. A whirlwind of thoughts and fantasies run through Casey's head, and she's pretty sure she's died and gone to heaven because this _feeling_, this is more than what she's ever imagined it would be. When she came into Derek's dorm, she didn't know what exactly she was walking herself into. In all the scenarios she had in mind, she never had pictured this. Instead she thought, after much determination and trials, she would eventually get Derek to admit his.. whatever he felt for her and then they would kiss, hold hands, and just be happy; but Derek toppling her was not on the top of the list or even close to being on it.

Throughout this rush of madness, she momentarily reflects on Adam&Eve, and she now knows why Eve ate the fruit from the forbidden tree because _goddamn_, it's incredible and the best thing she's ever tasted. Who knew sin could be so exhilarating? Derek moves his face back in front of Casey so he can look at her, but his hands are still moving on their own accord and making it hard for Casey to pay attention. He rests his head on her forehead and his hot breath tickles her face. She tries to look up at him, but his eyes are closed.

"You don't know how _long_ I've wanted to do this for." Derek says in such anguish. If this had been any other situation, Casey would've felt bad for him, but right now, all she's wondering is why has he stopped because, once he makes this sudden statement, his hands drop unexpectedly.

"Derek.."

"Do you know what you do to me?" His eyes stay closed, but his mouth is set in a grim line and out of the corner of Casey's peripheral, she can see his fists balled up like he's trying to hold back. She keeps staring at him, hoping to see his eyes, because she knows that's the only place where she can find some semblance of how he actually feels, and it's not just another fabrication of lies and pranks that he can hide behind. She stays silent, however, unsure if the question was rhetorical or not.

He looks at her with a solemn expression and suddenly gets up. The moment is ruined, and Casey thinks to herself how she wishes it wasn't. She watches as he strides over to the small kitchen and sits on one of the barstools. He runs a hand through his hair and looks at a point on the wall, avertedly opposite from Casey's form. She wonders if she should get up and follow or to just stay put, but she decides on the latter because she's scared that he might shun her away. So they're left there on opposite sides of the dorm, Derek avoiding Casey's stare and Casey sitting there nervously, neither one of them saying a word.

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><p><strong><em>Annnddd<em> that's the end.**

**Just kidding. Seriously though, this has been sitting on my computer for literally two years, (or a little bit before the VWD movie came out) and I haven't touched it since. I decided after so long, that I should at least upload it because I would've hated to have it not been published; at least for my own benefit. Surprisingly, this was supposed to be humorous as well, but somehow in the midst, it turned all angsty on me. I might finish this sometime, and I may not. I really liked where this was going, I just can't finish my thoughts T-T especially after two years. So here's to hope that I will continue! If anyone has any thoughts as how I should end this (because I'm indefinitely unoriginal lol), please send me a note! Alright, that's all for now.**


End file.
